Things To Do Today In London: Wednesday 3 January 2018

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You'll need your detective head on to solve the mystery of this missing apprentice.

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Things to do

LINO PRINTING: Get your craft on at this lino printing workshop and next time it's someone's birthday you'll have an original, handprinted card ready to go. Paperchase (Tottenham Court Road), £20, book ahead, 5.30pm-7.30pm

IMMERSIVE MYSTERY GAME: Bring six of your (smartest) friends to this immersive escape room-style game set in a Victorian pumping house, where you must solve the mystery of the missing apprentice. The London Museum of Water and Steam (Brentford), £28 (includes high tea), book ahead, 7.15pm-10pm, 3-5 January

CHOCOLATE WORKSHOP: Stick two fingers up at the fitness and health kick bug everyone catches this time of year and get yourself to this free chocolate-making workshop at the NHM's Ice Rink Café Bar. Natural History Museum, free, book ahead, 7pm-8pm and 8pm-9pm

FREE TAPAS: Every Wednesday you can nab yourself free tapas courtesy of the generous folks at Casa Manolo. (Drinks not included). Casa Manolo (Angel), free, book ahead, 7pm-9.30pm

SECRET VARIETY CLUB: This now not-so-secret variety night features Elf Lyons, Pat Cahill, Adam Larter and more, with accolades that stretch from Edinburgh Festival nominations to rave reviews from Chortle. Aces & Eights, £3.30, book ahead, 7.30pm

Learn how to make lovely lino printed cards at Paperchase.

LIVE COMEDY: Laugh your way into the New Year at this live comedy night. If you're lucky, you might get a top comic from 8 Out of 10 Cats, Live at the Apollo, Mock the Week, and Have I Got News For You. 99 Club (Leicester Square), £9, book ahead 8.30pm

ACOUSTIC SESSIONS: Need some downtime after the festivities? Get your chill on at this night of West Coast folk, country and blues from three live musicians. The Half Moon Putney, £10/£8, booking recommended, 8pm-11.30pm

KICK OUT THE JAMS: If you're one of the lucky ones not back at work and you fancy making the most of it, head to this Wednesday funk, soul and disco night, playing all your fave '70s and '80s tunes. Queen of Hoxton, free entry, just turn up, 8pm-midnight

WEST END ROULETTE: Get your new year off to a wild start at this midweek soirée,  featuring two of the finest West End cabaret stars, Michael Twaits and Sarah Bodalbhai. Phoenix Artist Club, £9/free for members, book ahead, 9pm-11pm

CAROLE NUNES: If you're as potty for plants as textile artist Carole Nunes, you'll love this exhibition of nature-inspired sculptures, created using silk painting and hand embroidery, some of which have been inspired by Columbia Road Flower Market. Barbican Library, free, just turn up, 3-27 January

Good cause of the day: Join Impact Hub Brixton

Impact Hub Brixton, the community collective behind the People's Fridge, is hosting an open house session on Friday. Bring your ideas for a better Lambeth, learn how to get involved on the evening tour or head along to the member's lunch at 1pm (£3, just turn up). Pop Brixton, free, just turn up, 5pm-5.30pm, 5 January

Fun things to do with our friends and sponsor Funzing...

LOVE Dim Sum? Learn to Make Delicious Dim Sum!

Fancy some Dim Sum fun? From making and rolling the dough to preparing the fillings and forming the parcels, William will show you everything you need to know to become a Dim Sum pro. William will also teach you the etiquette of Dim Sum - learn what to order and how to order, in Cantonese! Get tickets

Interviews With British Serial Killers

Could you spent hours on end satiating your morbid curiosity by researching serial killers? Hey, you're not alone. Insight into the criminal psyche is a fascinating topic and one covered in this talk by retired police officer, Paul Harrison. You'll encounter the stories of three of the UK's worst serial killers, from their childhoods to their crimes. With over four decades of experience in the Criminal Justice system, join Paul to work through the facts, uncover the details, and get inside the heads of these killers to discover what truly motivates a murderer.  Get tickets

Become Robin Hood for the Day in an Archery Class

Ever fancied yourself as Robin Hood? Join the 2020 archery team in London Bridge and discover how to shoot. The 1.5 hour 'get started in archery' class will teach you how to shoot (relatively) accurately as well as the scoring system and key archery terminology. The session finishes with a mini-competition where you can show off your new-found skills. Get tickets

Sex, Death and Shopping: The Soho Tour

We all know Soho is changing - and fast. But does the Soho of decades past - fiercely independent, occasionally seedy, always flamboyant - still exist? Antony Robbins claims it does - if you know where to look. A former director at the Museum of London, Robbins now leads walking tours of Soho, delving into the area's past and present. His Sex, Death and Shopping tour covers scandals of yesteryear through to present-day erotica - taking in hidden gardens, sinister histories, and little-known facts of famous places. A bit sinister. A bit salacious. And exceedingly well-tailored. It's a tour to have you falling in love - or lust - with this part of London all over again.  Get tickets