Things To Do Today In London: Wednesday 3 January 2018

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You'll need your detective head on to solve the mystery of this missing apprentice.

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Things to do

LINO PRINTING: Get your craft on at this lino printing workshop and next time it's someone's birthday you'll have an original, handprinted card ready to go. Paperchase (Tottenham Court Road), £20, book ahead, 5.30pm-7.30pm

IMMERSIVE MYSTERY GAME: Bring six of your (smartest) friends to this immersive escape room-style game set in a Victorian pumping house, where you must solve the mystery of the missing apprentice. The London Museum of Water and Steam (Brentford), £28 (includes high tea), book ahead, 7.15pm-10pm, 3-5 January

CHOCOLATE WORKSHOP: Stick two fingers up at the fitness and health kick bug everyone catches this time of year and get yourself to this free chocolate-making workshop at the NHM's Ice Rink Café Bar. Natural History Museum, free, book ahead, 7pm-8pm and 8pm-9pm

FREE TAPAS: Every Wednesday you can nab yourself free tapas courtesy of the generous folks at Casa Manolo. (Drinks not included). Casa Manolo (Angel), free, book ahead, 7pm-9.30pm

SECRET VARIETY CLUB: This now not-so-secret variety night features Elf Lyons, Pat Cahill, Adam Larter and more, with accolades that stretch from Edinburgh Festival nominations to rave reviews from Chortle. Aces & Eights, £3.30, book ahead, 7.30pm

Learn how to make lovely lino printed cards at Paperchase.

LIVE COMEDY: Laugh your way into the New Year at this live comedy night. If you're lucky, you might get a top comic from 8 Out of 10 Cats, Live at the Apollo, Mock the Week, and Have I Got News For You. 99 Club (Leicester Square), £9, book ahead 8.30pm

ACOUSTIC SESSIONS: Need some downtime after the festivities? Get your chill on at this night of West Coast folk, country and blues from three live musicians. The Half Moon Putney, £10/£8, booking recommended, 8pm-11.30pm

KICK OUT THE JAMS: If you're one of the lucky ones not back at work and you fancy making the most of it, head to this Wednesday funk, soul and disco night, playing all your fave '70s and '80s tunes. Queen of Hoxton, free entry, just turn up, 8pm-midnight

WEST END ROULETTE: Get your new year off to a wild start at this midweek soirée,  featuring two of the finest West End cabaret stars, Michael Twaits and Sarah Bodalbhai. Phoenix Artist Club, £9/free for members, book ahead, 9pm-11pm

CAROLE NUNES: If you're as potty for plants as textile artist Carole Nunes, you'll love this exhibition of nature-inspired sculptures, created using silk painting and hand embroidery, some of which have been inspired by Columbia Road Flower Market. Barbican Library, free, just turn up, 3-27 January

Good cause of the day: Join Impact Hub Brixton

Impact Hub Brixton, the community collective behind the People's Fridge, is hosting an open house session on Friday. Bring your ideas for a better Lambeth, learn how to get involved on the evening tour or head along to the member's lunch at 1pm (£3, just turn up). Pop Brixton, free, just turn up, 5pm-5.30pm, 5 January

Fun things to do with our friends and sponsor Funzing...

Lost London Walking Tour

London is a city of incredible transformation. With structural remains that date back to ancient history still in existence, this unique walking tour takes in Lost London in all its former glory. From the Titanic booking office to the graveyards of man's best friend, you'll discover the weird and wonderful places that used to exist in the capital but are now only committed to memory. Using old photographs, newspaper cuttings and stories from the past, you'll be amazed at what has largely been written out of our history books...   Get tickets

The London Cheese Crawl

Whether you’re a pre-grated cheddar sprinkler or mimolette fan, this cheesy walking tour will delight your senses. Starting off at a cheese counter in Mayfair that has been serving for more than 300 years, you'll tour the city's best dairy delights - including Fortnum & Mason, where the royals get their fix.   Get tickets

The British Museum Tour - Ideas That Made Our World

Track the journey of humanity through this tour around the British Museum. The tour aims to help you understand why the world is the way it is, and show how humans learned to question absolutely everything. Get tickets

Paddle Boarding in East London - Beginners

Take to the waters and glide about in this beginner paddleboarding session. By the end of it, you'll be standing up and paddling solo, and there's plenty of help on hand to improve your technique. Change of clothes required.  Get tickets